How Massa & Marie are ruining my birthday

Okay, I'm getting more than a little hyper about turning 50 in ten days. And I can blame the media, Eric Massa, Marie Osmond and NutriSystem for all this anxiety.

The media has been covering the Eric Massa story non-stop for the last week and Massa hasn't helped by appearing everywhere from CNN to Fox. Massa is being accused of sexually harassing a male staffer. When asked about a "groping" incident, he admits to it and then goes on to explain that it was more of a "ticklefest" and this was just something that happens at 50th birthday celebrations. It was his 50th birthday party. Really?  Call the restaurant and cancel my party if that's the "average" experience. 

Ah, and then there's NutriSystem. Their most recent advertisement features a woman who lost 96 pounds telling Marie Osmond her story. She explains that her motivation was turning 50 because " if you're overweight and 50, there's really no hope for you." Seriously??!!  Should I just pack it in right now and not bother thinking I have a future?  Not quite sure who the marketing genius is who approved that ad, but it didn't win any fans with any of us who were born in 1960.

I was planning on talking about my progress on my weight loss journey in this post, but since I'm not at my goal weight yet and my 50th birthday is a little over a week away, the geniuses at NutriSystem are telling me that I shouldn't bother with it.  

Well now that I've ranted about it, I feel better about it and will talk about my breakthroughs and fitness plans in tomorrow's post.

One of my favorites: CaringBridge

Nonprofit organizations are my passion. I love helping nonprofits and I love seeing the wonderful things that they do. One of my current projects at work is looking at how other nonprofits recognize their donors. This has given me an opportunities to learn about their mission and vision and thus far, we have visited the Hudson (WI) Hospital, Courage Center and the University of Minnesota Foundations. I hope to feature their work in future posts.

But I want to start with a personal favorite. I adore CaringBridge and the service they provide is priceless. Unlike the three nonprofits mentioned above, they aren't a bricks and mortar type of business. They are virtual. CaringBridge provides free websites that connect family and friends during a serious health event, care and recovery. In the Summer of 2008 when my sister was battling Cancer, our family learned the wonderful blessing CaringBridge is to families facing difficult health situations.

A CaringBridge website is personal, private and available 24/7. It helps ease the burden of keeping family and friends informed. The sites are very simple to create and use. Authors add health updates and photos to share their story while visitors leave messages of love and support in the guestbook.  I would bet that most people have followed the story of someone on CaringBridge or perhaps have first-hand experience of authoring a site themselves.

Their mission statement explains the true impact of their service: "To bring together a global community of care powered by the love of family and friends in easy, accessible and private way." The closest thing to a hug given virtually.

According to their website, more than 30 million families depend on CaringBridge and each day more than half a million people connect through CaringBridge. One of the users of CaringBridge wrote this: "We had no idea God would use the tool of CaringBridge to bring us the comfort and hope we needed so badly."

CaringBridge is a 501(c)3 charitable nonprofit and because their service is free to the users, they depend upon individuals, corporations and foundations for financial support. Next time, you're considering your charitable gifts, consider including CaringBridge on the your list. I know it's on mine.

Saving Private Ryan

Did you watch the Oscars Sunday night? I didn't. It's another change in my personality that really intrigues me. In the past, I never missed a single award show - People's Choice, Grammys, Emmys, Tonys, Oscars, American Music Awards, etc. Today, I don't even pay attention to who is nominated.

I remain a fan of the movies, television and theater. So instead of watching the Oscars, I watched a movie - seemed appropriate.  I watched the amazing Steven Spielberg movie, "Saving Private Ryan." It is emotional movie in many ways, but for me the scene that destroys me is the final one in the cemetery in France. Not the rows and rows of white markers representing the thousands who died, but seeing James Ryan - the title character - standing before the grave of the man who saved him.  He is standing there wearing a golf polo shirt with a powder blue golf jacket over it, looking very much like my dad. It was his official uniform for the last 10 years of his life. 

My dad was a World War II Veteran who served in the Pacific. He was very proud of that service and rightly so.  He would rarely talk about his time in the Navy and I never pushed him for information. I so wished that I had.

When I first saw the movie in 1998, it had only been four years since my dad had past away. While I shed a tear or two during the movie, I started to sob uncontrollably during the final scene as the character was now my dad standing there in his golf jacket.  Since we had met at the theater, Dan walked me to my car, but I was still crying. I told him that I would be fine and that he should go home. I would cry for another 20 minutes sitting there in my car.

So, I watched "Saving Private Ryan" this past Oscar night, now 16 years removed from my dad's death. I still cried pretty hard, but when the scene was over, my crying was over, too.  I wonder if I cry today more from the emotional memory of how that  final scene impacted me or because I still see my dad in his golf jacket.

I can't think of any other movie that has impacted me emotionally like this movie did. Do you have a "Saving Private Ryan" movie that causes you to react differently?

The Big 5-Oh

Three weeks from today, I turn fifty. The big 5-oh. Five year away from being eligible to live in senior housing. The half century mark.  UGH!!  Look, I know that turning 50 is WAY better than the alternative, but there's just something about that number. 50...

I was 12 when my dad turned 50 and 16 when my mom turned 50. I don't remember thinking that they were "really old" at 50. At those ages, I thought anyone over 21 was old.

I've been trying to remember what age my parents were when I thought they were finally old.  But everything with age is relative and I was 22 when my dad turned 60 - one year past my former old guideline. 

I have a wonderful friend who is 14 years my junior. We met when I was 28 and she was 14 and we have been friends ever since. Our birthdays are four days apart, so Jessie turned 16 just four days before I turned 30. That day, she and another young friend decorated my office in black streamers. 

In 2004, Jessie turned 30 herself and called me to apologize. She confessed that on my 30th birthday, she thought 30 was REALLY old, but now that she's 30, she realized how wrong she was. It's all relative. 

My geeky side has found an odd way of coping. I've started referring to March 22nd as the launch of version 5.0 - just like software. Because you know that each new version provides a better product. And that's what I am - a better version of who I was at 40, who I was at 30 and most definitely who I was when I was 20.

Olympic skating - IMHO Part II

I had to take some time after last Thursday's men's Olympic Figure Skating final to recover. I was thinking about what I wanted to write to follow up my earlier post when it happened...and I'm still in shock, although many friends remind that I shouldn't have been surprised.

Evan Lysacek won the Olympic Gold Medal by a narrow margin ahead of Russia's Evgeny Plushenko. Plushenko was a poor sport and pouted. And he's still pouting.

I'm going to say this right now: Lysacek outSKATED Plushenko. Plushenko may have outJUMPED Lysacek, but this is a skating competition and not a jumping competition. Interestingly, if it was a jumping competition and you only counted the number of jump revolutions, then Plushenko still loses! Lysacek jumps had a total of 32 revolutions (3Lz+3T/3A/3S/3A+2t/3Lo/3F+2T+2Lo/3Lz/2A) and Plushenko, even with his quad, still had one less revolution (4T+3T/3A/3A+2T/3Lo/3Lz/3Lz+2T/3S/2A). Technically, Lysacek beat Plushenko, not in the air, but at ice level - step sequences and spins. Lysacek's circle step sequence was a full point above Plushenko's (5.10 to 4.10) and Lysacek's flying sit spin was a level four while Plushenko's was only a level three.

Leaving the number crunching behind, Lysacek's jump quality was superior to Plushenko. You need to consider the four parts of a jump - the approach, the take-off, air position and the landing. Just think -flow in and flow out. Plushenko's jumps in the air were often tilted and his landings were scratchy and, at times, lacked flow. Lysachek's jump looked easy because he has perfected them.

Plushenko's behavior since the end of the competition has been disappointing for a past Olympic champion. Even more disappointing was a commentary the next morning on Yahoo! Sports by Canadian champion and two-time Olympic Silver Medalist, Elvis Stojko. Elvis' commentary was that Plushenko should have won the gold medal based on the quad alone. Reading the commentary broke my heart because I always admired Elvis and liked his spunky, athletic skating.

Many have said that the commentary was just sour grapes by Stojko because he never won the gold. That's sad. Elvis railed against the judges and how the system is set up. How, by not automatically giving the gold to Plushenko, we had set the sport back by years.

Thankfully, Elvis wasn't the only former two-time Olympic Silver Medalist from Canada to share his thoughts on the men's event. Brian Orser (who won the silver in 1984 and 1988) said that "given the system today," the right skater won the event.

The sport is different from Elvis' time. Now, each skater has the same number of elements to perform during a 4:30 minute program. If they are smart (and Frank Carroll and Lori Nichols are very smart), they design a program that takes full advantage of the points and then make sure the skater performs each element well enough to gain additional points for the elements from the judge's GOEs (Grade Of Execution). Plushenko didn't do that.

The right skater won the event.

And yes, I think the right dance team won the dance event last night. My American heart was hoping that Meryl and Charlie would win, but Tessa and Scott had the performance of their lives. If you're asking about the bronze medal ice dance team, that's a different story.

Olympic skating - IMHO

Watching the Olympic figure skating is causing sleep deprivation as I'm staying up too late to watch the events. It's been worth it since I'm seeing some amazing programs and enjoy cheering on Team USA. I know the judges are always looked at as an enemy of the skater, but being a judge myself, I can tell you that they want the skaters to succeed because when they skate well, judging is an enjoyable experience.

You didn't hear it during the pairs events, but suddenly we're hearing trash talk by the skaters about how the judges are against them or how all the skaters hate him because he's so good or how if you don't have a quad, you might as well be in ladies' skating. Is it just a way to make excuses in advance?

Everyone knew the men's event was going to be the most competitive event with one of the best field of men I can remember. There were some inconsistent performances last night - maybe because some were more than just a little nervous skating at the Olympics - but there were some incredible programs. I thought Plushenko was technically perfect, but his presentation was painful to watch.

I love a great footwork sequence as skaters show how well they can control their edges and balance. You want to see the skater using their full body, but Plushenko's footwork was mostly arm flailing to distract from his crappy edge quality.

The short program is often referred to as the "technical program" because the skaters have required elements that have to be included. In the short program, technique is what its all about. I have to remind myself of that fact quite often when watching because I'm always looking for the total package of technical and presentation. When I was training (we call it trial judging), I would get dinged when I would put too much emphasis on the presentation.

There is a wonderful judge named Bette Snuggerud who worked with judges in training. At one event, I had a skater marked too low against where she placed and while I thought I was giving great reasons why I marked her low (no presentation), Bette reminded me that it is the TECHNICAL program and that I need to keep that in mind. But she went on to say the one thing that has always stuck with me, that "Dollars for donuts, the skater will not be in the top tomorrow if her presentation skills are weak."  It was the dollars for donuts part that made the lesson stick.

I'm hoping that all the skaters do well tomorrow night, and yes, I'm pulling for Evan over Plushenko because I'm an American and have always thought of him as a nice midwest kid.  Never cared that much for Plushenko and I think it speaks volumes about Plushenko that besides his coach, he also had his publicity agent at the boards during the competition. I've seen skaters have their choreographer or sports psychologist at the boards during a competition, but a press agent? It tells you where his priorities are.

Go Team USA. Kick some Russian butt.